Everyone Matters...
Sometimes things get broken and they don't get fixed...I was talking to a buddy of mine who was tuning up an old car.
It was good to see because it meant that once tuned, that old car would be smoother running, less trouble, and more reliable. But my friend also knew as he looked at the car that at some point, no tune-up in the world will make it run.
New oil, tires,and parts would not make any difference. It would be time to accept the way things are and move on. This is not defeat. It is acceptance and a time for new hope. There are things in my life that are broken. They will not be " fixed ". That's O.K....How often do I agonise over things and waste emotional energy on relationship issues that were not and will not be resolved in somebody elses " ideal " format.
No, we must never stop loving and supporting others. Conversely, we can't twist ourselves into: "It has to be this way"...It would be easy, convenient, and seemingly appropriate to leave some people on the shelf. But, that won't happen because everyone matters.
I remember stopping my car on the bridge when I saw a man who was going to jump into the river. He was on the river side of the rails and he was just barely hanging on, talking to the world at large. I stopped my car, got out and began to engage him. He got talking to me and said " You have never wanted to take your life , you should just F__k off and let me die". I began to yell at him as I drew closer ( I had dialed 911 by this point and the Police were on their way ) I yelled back to him " F__k you ! I went through a time of planning the event for myself, but I'm still here.There is always a way to wade through this Bull s__t like the rest of us! " After talking and yelling at him, the police drew closer and we rushed him in time to pull him back up over the rail and onto his belly. But , the world is cruel. As I stood talking to him before the police arrived, people slowed their cars down and yelled at me to get off the road and out of their way . Others things were yelled by passersby as well that make me shudder as I write this blog. I arrived home afterwards and collapsed inside the door in tears as I said to my daughter " what is wrong with so many people ? " Apparently, I was told afterwards that I kept saying over and over " everyone matters "
I realised soon after I de-briefed about what had taken place on the bridge that I had first heard " everyone matters " from my mother while I was growing up. She had grown up in a poor family and a rundown neighborhood in Northern Ireland and had much to be angry about.
Despite her poverty, her father's unemployment, his early death and her mother's comments to her in her teenage years such as " you will never be as pretty as I am ", she later stopped me in the time of my youthful rejection of another child
and said: " You must not turn your back on that little boy, Jesus loves him just like he loves you... everyone matters ".
I scoffed at those epithets in later years as a proud young man, but I know now that nothing in this world has ever held more truth in my life than those words....Yes, many suicides are successful, relationships get broken and will not be and cannot be fixed in the way we would like. Despite her passing, the words of that old Irish woman were never more needed in this world than they are today:... " everyone matters "
Sometimes things get broken and they don't get fixed...I was talking to a buddy of mine who was tuning up an old car.
It was good to see because it meant that once tuned, that old car would be smoother running, less trouble, and more reliable. But my friend also knew as he looked at the car that at some point, no tune-up in the world will make it run.
New oil, tires,and parts would not make any difference. It would be time to accept the way things are and move on. This is not defeat. It is acceptance and a time for new hope. There are things in my life that are broken. They will not be " fixed ". That's O.K....How often do I agonise over things and waste emotional energy on relationship issues that were not and will not be resolved in somebody elses " ideal " format.
No, we must never stop loving and supporting others. Conversely, we can't twist ourselves into: "It has to be this way"...It would be easy, convenient, and seemingly appropriate to leave some people on the shelf. But, that won't happen because everyone matters.
I remember stopping my car on the bridge when I saw a man who was going to jump into the river. He was on the river side of the rails and he was just barely hanging on, talking to the world at large. I stopped my car, got out and began to engage him. He got talking to me and said " You have never wanted to take your life , you should just F__k off and let me die". I began to yell at him as I drew closer ( I had dialed 911 by this point and the Police were on their way ) I yelled back to him " F__k you ! I went through a time of planning the event for myself, but I'm still here.There is always a way to wade through this Bull s__t like the rest of us! " After talking and yelling at him, the police drew closer and we rushed him in time to pull him back up over the rail and onto his belly. But , the world is cruel. As I stood talking to him before the police arrived, people slowed their cars down and yelled at me to get off the road and out of their way . Others things were yelled by passersby as well that make me shudder as I write this blog. I arrived home afterwards and collapsed inside the door in tears as I said to my daughter " what is wrong with so many people ? " Apparently, I was told afterwards that I kept saying over and over " everyone matters "
I realised soon after I de-briefed about what had taken place on the bridge that I had first heard " everyone matters " from my mother while I was growing up. She had grown up in a poor family and a rundown neighborhood in Northern Ireland and had much to be angry about.
Despite her poverty, her father's unemployment, his early death and her mother's comments to her in her teenage years such as " you will never be as pretty as I am ", she later stopped me in the time of my youthful rejection of another child
and said: " You must not turn your back on that little boy, Jesus loves him just like he loves you... everyone matters ".
I scoffed at those epithets in later years as a proud young man, but I know now that nothing in this world has ever held more truth in my life than those words....Yes, many suicides are successful, relationships get broken and will not be and cannot be fixed in the way we would like. Despite her passing, the words of that old Irish woman were never more needed in this world than they are today:... " everyone matters "
posted by mark at 8:19 PM
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