Tuesday, January 19, 2010


Contact...

Try this. Stop contacting people with whom you have been in fairly constant contact with for the last litle while. See if they contact you. I tried this. The results have been nothing short of astounding in some cases. There is a handful of people some distance away, who have stopped contacting me entirely except for special occasions such as Christmas,birthday, etc.

When I was initiating contact with them fairly frequently, I always had a sense that they were in touch with me as well. That was never the case at any time. I just didn't realize it. I was so caught up in the relationship of conversation,people,and news that it never occurred to me that those few didn't want to initiate a relationship, they were just responding
to my attempts to build a relationship over time.

It is a realization not without regret. This lack of reciprocal contact has helped me to understand what performance based relationships are all about. If I am not deemed worthy of their "life code" for me then I will receive less contact.You falter in their eyes...you're out or at least diminished.

Presently,I am still hopeful, but,as they say, reality and time reveal the truth about any relationship...

3 Comments:

Blogger Sue said...

perhaps they are thinking the same thing about you....just a thought

7:02 PM  
Blogger 2sunset said...

pretty glib Sue.

Thanks for sharing your heart in this blog, Mark.

9:38 PM  
Blogger Sue said...

You misunderstand me 2sun, I'm not trying to be glib, just stating that we have these thoughts in common. That others probably do as well. How isolated we would be if we all gave in to this thinking and didn't ever reach out. We were created for community and gain nothing by attacking each other.

2:51 PM  

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