The Bug...

There are things your kids might not forgive you for, but I hope this isn't one of them.
The nickname given to Meredith as a baby was " The Bug ". At many points when she was a baby, we stopped calling her
Meredith and simply said things like, " whoops we can't leave yet, I forgot to put the bug in the car.
Life is a series of transitions. First it was my kids going to school for the first time. Kindergarten:
out of my sight , with someone else during the day. Then adolescence, camps: gone for a week.
basketball tournaments in another city overnight in the states. Now my daughter in Europe who has returned.
I love her dearly, I miss her when she is not here and I love spending time with her. I can see... me ,... her mom,
the Irish and the Scot come out in her at different times and I celebrate all of those things ( yes, the scottish bits too )
I am so proud of Meredith ( bug ) and the new relationship that we are building.
But...I now know that there is new adulthood about her that creates a new sense of ownership in her own life.
It is a new sense of separation that makes us strangely closer in a different way now. She is the pathfinder, the "trailblazer"
if you will, for the other children I have. They too will experience this even if they return and live close to me or with
me during their college years. Then I will have a transition because of the so much and so many years that have been poured into them at close proximity. I will look over my shoulder and see that they are gone...No they haven't left the love of their father and they are very loyal in all of this, but their lives are so much more theirs and so yes...they are gone.
THAT will be a much more challenging time of transition for me than raising them ever was.